


Workplace Relationships

by IZKitty



Category: Game Grumps, NSP - Fandom, Ninja Sex Party - Fandom
Genre: But It's Because He Loves You, Danny Sexbang!relationship, Danny's Totally OOC, F/M, Fluff and Humor, NSP AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-16 09:54:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5824183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IZKitty/pseuds/IZKitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The famous lover and fighter Danny Sexbang would never be interested in his own secretary...right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Workplace Relationships

Working as the secretary for Ninja Sex Party seemed like an easy job. However, if anyone ever told you that, you’d laugh directly in their face. The team members Danny Sexbang and Ninja Brian were heroes without a doubt. But their fights against various space monsters, evil villains, and the infamous Samurai Abstinence Patrol left much of the city in ruin most of the time, leaving you to help city officials clean up the mess and push through paperwork to keep their space mansion and its occupants well financed.

One of the temporary “occupants” stepped into your office accidentally while looking for the front door. You didn’t even look up, used to Danny’s various one-night stands peeking into the small room while looking for the exit. “O-Oh! I’m sorry, I was just-”

“All the way down the hall, left of the strawberries and cream pool room,” you said nonchalantly, still sifting through papers as you pointed with the pen in your hand. The young blonde woman thanked you and went on her merry way, combing her fingers through her wild bed head as she left. She was the embodiment of what Danny would call ‘another satisfied customer.’

Said sexy Jew came into your office just a few minutes later, grinning like a dope as he sat himself on the edge of your desk. Again, this didn’t faze you, pulling documents closer to you to avoid losing them under his kimono-clad backside. “Chatting it up with that hot number I brought home, [y/n]? I’m sure she was going on and on about my amazing Sexbang skills.” He flexed his arm in what you assumed was a serious manner, but you couldn’t help but roll your eyes in response.

“Oh, yeah. We couldn’t stop giggling about what a total stud you are,” you replied, stopping your ministrations for just a minute to look up at him. You had to admit, looking up at him in all his handsome, post-sex glory dared to cause a blush to creep to your cheeks, but you had since learned from the first day on the job to stamp out those feelings. After all, Danny slept with a different woman nearly every night. Why would he stop that ‘glorious’ life of sex and variety to be in a relationship with you?

“Aw, come on, [y/n]...don’t be like that,” he said with a pout, and you couldn’t help but smile. The light tugging of your lips brought a grin to his own.

Running a hand through your own [h/c] hair, you sat back in your chair. “I’m sorry, I’ve just been working non-stop since that battle you and Brian had with that mutant rhino and the cyber-cat. Those things caused a lot of damage…”

“I think it was a puma, but whatever. Guess you had to be there.” Danny shrugged and leaned closer to you, the smirk never fading from his face. “Hey, why don’t you take a break from all this silly work and go get a coffee with me?”

You gave him one of your trademark no-nonsense stares, which Danny so fondly dubbed as a “killjoy” stare. Nonetheless, you had no time for his shenanigans. “That’s the last thing I wanna do for a number of reasons, Daniel,” you sighed, pressing your pen to the form in front of you to sign it, finally finished with checking the fine print.

Just as you inked the last line, Danny’s large palm gently tilted your chin back up to look into his dark brown eyes, and you felt your cheeks flush with heat. “But you’ve been working since last night,” he whined. “I know you want a break, or at least something to eat.”

Giving another tired sigh, you nodded once. “True...but I really need to finish all of this before tomorrow.”

At that, Danny raised a scarred brow at you. “Tomorrow? What’s going on tomorrow?”

“Well, not that it’s any of your business, but I have a date tomorrow.” You did have a life outside of the team, after all. And you felt a bit bad for being a tad harsh, but the constant distractions were really keeping you from your work, and it was just like you had said; you wanted to be done so there’d be no diversions while you were out.

Even though you were once again buried in your work, nose in another stack of forms for the cleanup of Minneapolis, you couldn’t help but sense a hint of reserved melancholy in Danny’s soft, “Oh.” The office was silent for a while, the only sound the scratching of your pen as he kept trying to make fruitless eye contact with you. Finally, after what seemed like hours, he sighed and stood from his seat on your desk. “I...hope you have fun.” And with that, Danny left you alone, wondering what exactly he seemed so bummed about.

~~~

Another check in the mirror. Another check of any lint on your dress. Another check of what time it was. Jack was running incredibly late, and you were slowly growing more and more infuriated and miserable because of it. It never failed, you would meet up with a nice guy, they would ask you out...and then never show up. Were you really so unattractive that men felt the need to play games with you?

Calling Jack’s house was a bust, his phone rang and rang before going to voicemail. Once, you swore that he answered, but every time you said ‘Hello?’ or ‘Jack?’ you were met with a deadly silence. After the tenth failed call, you growled in frustration, nearly throwing your phone against a wall. At your near inhuman sound, Danny rounded the corner, taking in your sour expression and slumped posture as a sign that you were not in the best of moods.

“[y/n]? What’s the matter?” he asked quietly, approaching you but still keeping a safe distance, in case you actually decided to take up that idea to chuck your phone in his direction.

“Nothing...Jack stood me up. I guess I’m not good enough for anyone to date,” you sighed, wiping away your tears before they could track down your face and ruin your eye makeup.

At the sight of you crying, Danny abandoned all defenses and closed the gap, pulling you in for a warm hug. “Hey, hey...you’re definitely good enough. Fuck that guy, he doesn’t know what he’s missing out on.” Pulling back a bit to smile at you, he added, “If you’re up for it, maybe I could spend the night with you.”

You scoffed and pushed away. “Yeah, no thanks...I know what ‘spending a night’ means to you.” Being stood up was one thing, but being one of Danny’s pity lays was a new low.

“N-no, that’s not what I…” Danny began, but at that moment, someone knocked on the door, and your heart jumped in surprise as relief washed over you. You ran for the door, swinging it open with a wide smile. It faltered, however, when you were not met with Jack, but a very bloody Ninja Brian.

“Brian? What happened to you?” It wasn’t even appalling to you anymore when Ninja Brian came home covered in someone else’s blood. He was a ninja, after all, he was trained to kill. But a flash of something on his wrist caught your eye. Upon closer inspection, it was a Batman wristwatch. The same one that…

“Hang on...this is Jack’s watch. Brian, did you…?” You glared at him, and he quickly raised his hands in silent self-defense. It was kind of amazing that a guy who never showed emotion other than seething hatred feared your rage. He pointed over at Danny, who was standing behind you and twiddling his overlarge thumbs. Turning your attention to the fidgeting spandex-clad man, everything pieced together in your mind. “...It was you. You sent Brian out to kill Jack! Wait...so every date I had…?!”

Danny quickly shook his hands at you, trying to shed light on the situation as he stuttered over his words. “W-w-wait, [y/n]! I can explain!” he said frantically, but you silenced him with a slap to the face.

“So you get to bang any girl you want, but I can’t have a single, meaningful date with one guy?!” Your tears were flowing freely now as you clenched your fists in anger. “Well, fine...consider this my two weeks notice, because I refuse to work with a hypocritical asshole like you.” Before Danny could find his voice again, you stormed away into your room, slamming the door behind you.

After a long pause, Danny turned his attention over to Brian, his palm still nursing the cheek you had smacked. “You just had to steal his shit after you killed him, didn’t you?” Ninja Brian simply stared at him for a moment, before lifting both hands and flipping Danny off. The taller man sighed and shook his head, leaving Brian alone in the main hall of the mansion.

~~~

A few days later, you were back at work, though it was more for your own conscience than anything else. You had meant it when you had told Danny that you were quitting, but even though every fiber in your being told you to just leave, you couldn’t abandon your job like that. It wasn’t in your nature.

Regardless, every time you saw Danny pass by your office, you refused to even look in his direction, let alone speak to him. How could he toy with your emotions and love life like that? At the very least, he could have spoken to you about it, rather than just have Ninja Brian do his dirty work.

On the day you were expected to leave, you signed off on the last form before typing up a resignation letter to the city council, informing them of your decisions to leave, and that Danny would fill them in on your replacement. That is, if he ever looked for one. He wasn’t even trying, as if he would be able to say anything that would make you want to stay. But then again, that wasn’t your concern. Not anymore.

Just before you emailed the letter, Danny knocked on the door of your office, and you gave him a stare that could cut through stone. “What do you want?” you said coldly.

“[y/n]...Can I please just explain myself?” he asked softly, his eyes shining with regret and guilt over his choices. 

Giving the email one final glance, you sighed forcefully and turned to him, your arms crossed over your chest. “Fine.”

Danny seemed to relax just a bit, his shoulders slumping as he approached your desk. “Okay, I don’t know if you’ll believe me, or if you just see me as a jealous asshole-”

“Definitely see you as an asshole,” you quipped, but the first part of his statement confused you. You never thought he was jealous, he was the one getting laid left and right while you were struggling to secure just one date. Then again, you had to admit seeing him with all those random girls made you feel...something in your heart.

Sighing irritably, Danny pinched the bridge of his nose, his free hand resting on his hip. “All right, I deserved that…” He then snapped his head up to look at you. “...But I swear, I gave Brian specific instruction not to kill the guys you were planning on dating unless he had proof that the guy was going to mistreat you in some way.”

That stunned you into silence. Uncrossing your arms, you dropped them helplessly to your sides as you asked quietly, “What...what do you mean by that?”

Danny gave you a coy smirk, but unlike his usual goofy grins, this one seemed a bit more melancholy. “Having the files of every person in Attitude City has its perks. So Ninja Brian and I agreed that we’d do a background check on the guys you were going out with and see if they were...you know...good enough to date you.”

You weren’t sure what to say to this. There was such a strange mix of emotions running through your body. You were touched that Danny would go to such lengths to make sure your heart wasn’t broken in the long run, but at the same time, the whole situation seemed extremely sleazy and underhanded, especially because he had done it all behind your back. And was this all really what he described it as? He had mentioned something about jealousy…

As if he could read your mind, Danny sighed and ran a hand through his messy mop of curls. “I-I mean, I guess a small part of me was fueled by jealousy. I couldn’t bear the thought of anyone stealing your heart...But I knew you probably wouldn’t want to, like...go out with me anytime soon, and I promise if a guy had a clean record, I was going to back off and let you be.”

“Who said I wouldn’t want to date you, Danny?”

Your soft statement made his head whip up to stare at you, mouth agape and eyes wide. Smiling at him, you continued, “I always thought you weren’t interested because you seemed to enjoy sexing it up with all those ladies. Would you really throw that away to go out with me?”

Danny paused as if he was contemplating your question, before his face broke into his usual, giddy smirk. “I would gladly tell all other babes to fuck off if that meant being with you, [y/n].”

Your lips curled into a smile of your own, and you practically jumped out of your chair to run around your desk and tackle Danny into a loving embrace. “What do you say I take you up on that coffee you offered a couple of weeks ago?” you asked him, and he laughed and hugged you back without hesitation.

“Sounds like a plan. And I swear, no more sending Ninja Brian out on death missions behind your back...But just as a heads up, if we do ever end up doing the horizontal hello, he might be in the room while we’re in bed together.”

You laughed and shook your head. “Always with those jokes of yours,” you giggled.

“Yeah...that’s me...always joking,” he muttered, hugging you to his chest so you didn’t see as he glanced over at the door, Ninja Brian staring at him intensely with his arms crossed.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, lovelies!~ This is just a quick fluffy drabble that I wrote to get back in the swing of writing. (Mainly for the next I Burgie...Danny chapter~ *wink wink*) I just thought I'd share because...who doesn't love random self-indulgent fics involving the legendary sex beast that is Danny Sexbang? Hope you enjoy!


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